Butterfly Kisses Read online

  He pulled back enough that I caught sight of his light blue eyes, and the way he looked at me was unfamiliar.

  I looked down at the ground as he stepped away from me and when I looked up again, he was pulling his own shirt off and tossing it to the ground.

  My eyes became glued to the body they so often avoided on a regular basis. He was tan from summers spent by the pool, and he had gained an incredible build from all the sports training he’d done.

  It wasn’t like I hadn’t seen him with his shirt off numerous times before, but even then I had to urge myself to avoid staring for too long. Now, I was allowed to look and, I couldn't stop.

  He must’ve noticed because I heard him laugh, causing me to glance up at him.

  His smile made my cheeks heat in a blush, and I crossed my arms over my own body in embarrassment.

  “Ry, it's not a big deal.” He chuckled again. “You can look. I mean, I'm definitely looking.” He grinned as his eyes moved over me again.

  There was a time when his innocent flirting gave me hope that he might have felt something. That illusion faded over time though.

  I scrunched my nose up at him in a playful glare. He laughed, before moving to close the space between us.

  I always envied how calm and collected he always seemed, how he could joke his way out of any serious situation.

  When he finally reached me, he pressed me up against his bare chest so tightly that I knew he could feel my heart racing, and I swear I felt the thud of his own against me.

  “Don’t be nervous.” He reassured me. “You can trust me. I’ll go slow, and we can stop anytime you want.”

  I looked up at him and took a deep breath to steady myself. Then as he smiled, I grabbed his neck and pulled him down to kiss me again.

  He started walking me back towards the bed, the second my lips touched his. Then I felt the mattress hit the back of my legs, forcing me to sit down, and breaking me away from our kiss.

  “Are you going to be able to…?” I trailed off, embarrassed to even ask him.

  He started moving over me, forcing me to lay back against the bed.

  “To what?” He eyed me curiously.

  “You know, get… hard.” I blushed.

  He had me on my back now, hovering over me.

  He chuckled. “Ry, that isn't an issue.”

  I glanced down between us as he pressed the proof up against my leg and I felt my face flush.

  “Oh…” Was all I could manage before I caught his attention lingering on my chest.

  “Can I touch you?” He asked, when I caught him staring.

  I nodded nervously.

  His fingertips reached out and lightly brushed circles around one of my nipples until my back arched up off the bed and I whimpered.

  “Damn, Ry.” His voice sounded different, tense even, and I liked it. “Can I taste one?” He asked, watching me intently.

  All I could manage was another nod, and a split second later I felt his tongue repeating the same pattern his fingertips had just started.

  I sucked in a sharp breath and let it out in a heavy pant as I felt heat pooling between my legs. He pulled back and stared down at me before his fingertips started on the next one.

  “Do you like it?” He asked, leaning down and letting his tongue mimic its course of action on the next one.

  “Yessss.” I murmured softly, trying to keep what little control I had left.

  He sat back up, smiling down at me. “I love the sounds you make when I touch you.”

  The second he said it, he swallowed nervously. As if, the thought was meant to remain private.

  I let his words linger in my thoughts as his hand trailed down the middle of my chest and then lightly across my stomach before it came to a stop near the top of my panties.

  “Can I touch you, here?” He asked as his hand moved to hover over the top of the fabric that separated us.

  “Please...” I whined.

  The warmth of his hand collided with the heat that was already consuming me, and I moaned as he started rubbing against me in gentle circles.

  “Oh my god, Ty.” I hummed, as the build up sent pleasure I wasn’t used to, rippling through my body.

  “Fuck, Ry. I want to feel how wet you are, can I?” He asked in a broken voice.

  I nodded and he started gliding his fingers up and down along the fabric between my legs. I twisted in the sheets, stifling my moans the best I could. Then I watched as he slowly started pulling my panties down my legs, dropping them on the floor next to us.

  I felt his hand find it’s way back to me, trailing up the side of my body. Then, when he reached my waist, I felt his hand move back down between my legs again.

  Except this time, nothing separated us.

  I tilted my head back, and gasped. My hand reaching out to steady myself as I grasped his arm.

  “Ry, you look so hot right now.” He admitted in a shaky breath as he pressed the palm of his hand firmly against me again and rubbed.

  I clenched my eyes shut to focus on the way it felt, the way he felt.

  Then, I whimpered at his words.

  I wanted him to want me, so badly, that hearing him admit I was affecting him, in anyway, had my hips shifting off the bed to greet his hand.

  He stopped and I thought it was something I’d done wrong. I whined in disapproval.

  However, instead of his absence, I felt his fingers slip past the soft lips that rested between my legs. Instantly, I felt them brush over a spot that, before him, had only been touched by me.

  “Ty, oh my god.” I instinctively raised my hips up towards his hand again.

  “You’re so wet.” He breathed in a deep groan of approval.

  I’d never heard his voice so deep and raspy, and it impacted me instantly.

  I whimpered, “Ty, please...”

  “Are you sure?” He asked in a weighted breath.

  “Yes…” I gasped as my other hand fisted the sheets beneath us.

  He moved to stand up and left me feeling incomplete without him resting over me.

  I watched him pull something out of the pocket of his jeans. Then, he unzipped them and kicked them off on to the floor with the rest of our clothes.

  I caught sight of the condom in his hand and he looked over at me. “I didn't plan this, I swear.” He chuckled. “It’s just, I always keep one on me.”

  The reminder that he’d done this before hurt a little, but I smiled anyway.

  He slowly rolled the condom on and moved over me again. “It usually hurts the first time. So, if you need me to stop, just tell me.”

  I nodded. “Just go slow.”

  He leaned down and kissed my forehead. “I will, I promise.” He reassured me.

  I felt him gently nudge my legs apart so he could rest between them. He only shifted slightly before I suddenly felt him pressed up against me and it had my heart racing again.

  “Are you sure you’re ready?”

  I nodded.

  “Take a deep breath, Ry.”

  I inhaled a deep breath, just as he’d instructed. Then, just before I was about to exhale, I felt the pressure slowly build as he pushed himself inside of me.

  I exhaled quickly, before fumbling on my next intake of air. He was still moving slow, just as he promised, but the pressure inside of me was grow at a rapid pace.

  He leaned down to kiss me, providing a momentary distraction before I felt something inside of me tear in a matter of seconds, causing me to cry out and break free from our kiss.

  He came to a halt above me. “Are you okay?” He asked in his own quaky breath.

  I nodded again.

  “Breath, Ry.” He reminded me, as he nudged my ear with his lips to calm me. “Breath through it. I’m almost all the way in.”

  “It hurts.” I whimpered against his shoulder as I shifted under him in an attempt to regain the pleasure I’d been feeling, only seconds earlier.

  Instead, the only thing that seemed to help was Tyler’s
patience. The longer he waited for me to adjust the more the pain dulled.

  “Do you want me to stop?” He asked, sitting back up to look at me, brushing some hair out of my face with his finger.

  I shook my head. “No, please don’t stop.”

  He stared down at me and I felt him ease in a bit more. I could tell he was attempting to steady his breaths and remain in control for me.

  “I promise, once I’m all the way in, it will feel better.” He whispered against my lips, almost as if to beg me for permission to give into his own needs.

  “I’m ready.” I admitted in a shaky breath.

  This time, as he sat up, the second we made eye contact I felt him ease the rest of the way inside of me.

  We both gasped in relief, at the same time as he rested his forehead against mine to regain composure.

  He was right, the ache dulled in comparison to the way it felt to have him inside of me. However, nothing felt more powerful than the way he seemed just as lost to it, as I was.

  A flood of emotions coursed through me as I watched as his chest move with each of his new heavy breaths, and I couldn’t tell who was shaking.

  Was that him, or me?

  “Does that feel better?” He asked in a shuttered breath, before he slowly started to ease himself back out of me.

  “Yes,” I managed. “Please, don’t stop.” I begged, as his withdrawal from me caused a bigger ache with his absence.

  He leaned down to brush his lips along my neck as he eased back inside of me once more, his pace remaining slow and gentle.

  I adjusted to him a little more each time, and I could tell he noticed. Soon, he was taking each new thrust with a bit more urgency.

  “Fuck, Ry.” He groaned as he increased his pace. “I’m so sorry, am I hurting you?” He asked without slowing his thrusts.

  “No,” I moaned softly. “I promise. You feel…” I hesitated. “You feel…”

  “Yes, that’s it. Tell me how it feels, Ry. How does it feel to have me inside of you?” He urged in a raspy voice, causing my body to clench around him.

  “Ty…” I whimpered.

  “Please, Ry.” He encouraged again in an unsteady pant. “I need to hear you say it. Tell me.” He rasped, as he nuzzled my ear.

  His pace quickened even more, urging me for an answer with each new thrust and I could barely hold on any longer. “I’ve wanted this for so long, Ty.” I sobbed, pleasure rippling over me.

  “Yeah?” He questioned, in disbelief as I felt his lips run along my collarbone.

  “Yes…” I admitted in a moan, and he continued to thrust into me.

  “Then tell me. How does it feel to have me inside of you? Is it how you imagined it?” He urged on, with each new thrust he drove into me.

  My head tilted back in a gasp as I felt him fill me, over and over again.

  “Oh god, Ty…” I whimpered. “…you feel better than I ever imagined.”

  I heard the most animalistic growl come from his lips and the sound vibrated through my entire body, causing me to moan.

  “Fuuuuck, Ry.” He growled out, and thrust into me again, deeper than before. “I can't believe I’m inside of you, you feel so damn good.”

  “Ty, don’t stop.” I screamed, and he glanced back at my bedroom door before covering my mouth with his hand.

  He smiled down at me and laughed. “You're so loud, it’s hot but you’re going to make me come.” He warned.

  “Ty, not yet.” I pleaded against his hand, not wanting it to end yet. I knew once it did, it was over for us.

  “I’m trying.” He panted as he pulled his hand free from my mouth to steady himself on the bed above me.

  I felt his other hand reach down between us. His fingertips slowly starting to graze against my clit with each new thrust.

  “Oh god, Ty. Yes, keep doing that.”

  I felt something that was unfamiliar. I’d touched myself on numerous occasions. Yet, what I felt now dulled in comparison. My toes were curling, and my entire body was tightening up with an intensity that was aimed directly at my bodies core.

  “That's it, let go, Ry. I want to feel you come for me.”

  I’d do anything for him, and his words brought on a wave of pleasure I wasn’t ready for.

  “Ty!” I screamed out and his hand instantly found my mouth again.

  Me entire body shook beneath him as I came. Soft whimpers playing across my lips as I clung to him in the last moments of my orgasm, unwilling to let go of him.

  “Fuck, Ry. I can feel you.” He growled out as he thrusted into me a bit harder.

  Then, I felt him burry himself as deep as he could inside of me.

  “I’m coming.” He warned one last time, in a heated breath. He held tightly to me, thrusting gently against me as he came.

  He didn’t pull away from me right away, instead he lay over me as we caught out breaths.

  “Are you okay?” He asked, his face buried within my neck unwillingly to pull himself away from me.

  I smiled. “Yeah, are you?”

  He sat up and laughed. “Are you hurting?”

  “Only a little.”

  He stared down at me as if for the first time he honestly wanted to kiss me, and not because I'd asked him to.

  After a few moments he broke the silence, as if it was making him uncomfortable. “It won’t hurt as much the next time.” He reassured me, and I glanced up at him. “I mean, you know, with whoever.”

  I looked away. Yeah, I know.

  He cleared his throat nervously before kissing me, in a friendly manner, on my forehead. Then he slowly moved to his feet, pulling out of me.

  His absence was suddenly a reminder that it was over, and it wouldn’t happen again. My heart already feeling the immense pain that he’d warned me would happen if we ever slept together.

  I managed to gather my comforter and pull it over myself. I watched him remove the condom and toss in my garbage can.

  “I love you, Ty.” The words slipped out of me before I could recall them back and I saw panic rush over his face as he reached for his pants.

  “Ry, I …” He finished pulling on his jeans. “I mean… I do love you, but we can’t...”

  “Ty, I didn’t mean it like that.” I quickly retreated. “I just meant it like we always say it. Like, friends.”

  He eyed me, and I knew he didn’t believe me. He finished zipping up his pants and started looking for his t-shirt.

  “Ry, listen …”

  “Stop!” I yelled, and he froze. “Don’t ruin this for me. Just go, don’t say anything else. Just go finish packing for tomorrow and I’ll meet you at the treehouse tonight.”

  He nodded. “Okay, the treehouse. Sure, I can do that.” He still couldn’t find his t-shirt and so he grabbed his zip-up instead, pulling it over his shoulders and zipping it up. “If you find my shirt will you pack it? It’s one of my favorites.”

  “Yeah, I’ll find it.”

  He paused at my door as he reached for the doorknob, turning to look back at me.

  “Ry, I do care about you, so much.”

  “Ty, just go.”

  He stared at me for a moment and then he turned and left.

  I wish I could say that was the end of the story, but it wasn’t.

  That night I was waiting for him at the treehouse, but he never came.

  I convinced Sadie to come get me and give me a ride to his dorm because I was convinced something had to be wrong.

  However, when I got there, I found out I couldn’t be more wrong.

  I knocked on his door a few times before he answered. He was still in his jeans without a shirt on and I could tell by the look on his face he wasn’t expecting me to show up.

  “Ry…”

  “Were you even going to show up?”

  “I was, I just got done packing. I just needed to figure out what I was going to say first.”

  I heard people in the dorm behind him which wasn’t unusual, I knew he shared it with one of
his classmates.

  Yet, something felt wrong in my gut and I shoved the door as hard as I could. It caught him off guard and he stumbled backwards pulling the door open along with him.

  On the couch sat a girl I knew well, Crystal, and she was topless. His roommate was on another couch with someone else and it was clear Crystal was there for him.

  The feeling gutted me like it never had before and I turned to leave.

  Tyler called out after me. “Ry, wait! I’ll go with you and we can talk.”

  “I don’t need to talk.” I yelled back.

  “Ry, please.” His voice cracked, and it pleased me. I wanted him to feel guilty.

  I stopped and turned around to face him. “You know I thought if it was you, I couldn’t regret it.”

  He went to say something, pain in his eyes but I put my hand up to stop him.

  “No, Ty. It’s okay. I just forgot that the only person who has ever really broken my heart is you. It’s always been you, and if I don’t stop it now, you will continue to break it over and over again.”

  I turned and walked away that night and I never looked back. He never came after me either.

  Sadie and I got back to my house and loaded my bags up and we left town that night, without Tyler.

  Chapter 8

  Tyler

  I was standing in the kitchen watching my mom finish up dinner. I’d been coming here right after work for a week straight now.

  “Are you going to eat with us tonight?”

  “Probably not, just killing time before I head home. Work was hectic today.”

  “Tough kids this year?”

  “I feel like the parents are getting harder to deal with, rather then the kids.”

  “Maybe if you stopped sleeping with the parents, it might get easier.”

  I rolled my eyes. “Thanks mom but I don’t sleep around as much as you assume, I do.”

  I was still dressed from work in my dark jeans and dress shoes. I rolled up my black button up shirt, so my sleeves weren’t to long and started helping my mom by doing some dishes.

  “Ryder will be in town for the weekend.” My mom mentioned out of nowhere and I was sure it had been gnawing at her since the moment I got there.

  “I know, dad told me.”